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Jul. 11th, 2014

Fic: Mirror Mirror (AWZ/kind-of-BtSV-but-not-really crossover). CAREFUL, CONTAINS KATJA.

So I was gonna write some heartbreaking historical mountaineering slash for Fic or Die. And then the fic that chose to finish itself instead was AWZ crossover crack featuring Katja Fucking Bergmann. I'm sorry, but not sorry enough to spare you :p

Title: Mirror Mirror
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles was zählt with a tiny smidge of BtSV. Katja Bergmann, Mirror Twin.
Word Count: ~2000
Rating: PG-13 for a bit of language
Warnings: KATJA.
Summary: In which Katja's Mirror Twin is a vengeance demon. And Katja used the W word. Oops.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
A/N: I'm not tagging this BtSV because it's really not a Buffy fic, but I did steal the vengeance demon mythology from BtSV. Unbeta'd, so feel free to point out errors or shut up about them, I am really supremely uninvested in this fic, lol.

~~~ Fic is here at AO3 ~~~

Jan. 28th, 2012

Fanfic Meme 2011

Wheeee, it's that time of year. Time to ramble self-involvedly about your fic-ly achievements for the year. Don't be afraid to give yourself a pat on the back ;)


ALL the fic talk )

Dec. 9th, 2011

The (Last Edition of) the Best and Worst of AWZ, 2011

Yo. It's the weekend and I have nothing to do. Naturally this would be ideal conditions to go do something productive such as work on Perfect Combination edits or write something for the AWZ femmeslash ficathon (I do have ideas, I swear I do!), but after careful consideration I have decided that that would be, you know, creative and useful and entertaining and might actually shake me out of my current obstinate mopey mood AND WE CAN'T HAVE THAT, CAN WE.

No, no, we can't. So instead I decided to do one final round-up of the Best and Worst of AWZ, because... fuck me if I know why, really, but it sounded like some twisted version of fun. I might actually need to be committed.

Wheeeeeeeee! )

Dec. 7th, 2011

Spoilers: Episode 1346-1354

Title: Spoilers: Episode 1346-1354 (The Very Unlikely Romance Of Katja Bergmann and Isabelle Reichenbach)
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles was zählt; Katja/Isabelle; hints of: *Franziska/Melanie; Sarah/Melanie; Bergmann sistercest* [highlight to read]
Rating: Gen; NOTHING THAT OFFICIAL AWZ SPOILERPICS WOULD NOT BE OKAY WITH
Spoilers: Through 1355-ish. (If you actually paid attention to official AWZ spoiler pics which I HOPE TO GOD YOU DON'T AND IF YOU DO, GOOD GRIEF, DO YOU NOT HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE?!)
Summary: Simone has a brandnew business idea. Katja and Isabelle go along with it, completely ignoring any feelings-you-might-feel.
Disclaimer: These characters belong to RTL, who haven't the first bleeding idea of what to do with them.
A/N: My first *yes I am planning MOAR, just gimme time* contribution to the AWZ femslash ficathon 2011. These are brandnew and totally authentic, not at all made up AWZ spoilers that will happen any moment now *CHIRP*. Don't you dare question my Very Authentic And Not At All Made-Up Official Spoiler Translations. Any deliberately cheesy spoiler phrasings are deliberate. Big thanks to my ever vital beta [info]lilithilien for her essential contributions :D WE OWN SHOW, DON'T YOU KNOW.

Follow the yummy sugary crack. You know you want to. )

Oct. 7th, 2011

This happened at the Igloo today (or: The Lengths I Will Go To To Avoid Work)

[info]lilithilien and [info]aldiara gaze upon the utter yawnfest exciting beauty of the spoilerpics. Then:

"Sarah has a dream."



Aldi: Ugh ugh ughetty ugh, that is Deniz's bed, ugh.
Lil: Uhm, is that Jenny's red bra??
Aldi: Nope, I guess Dr. Hooker stole that when she left:


(Just trust me that it's Jenny, okay. Or if you don't, go rewatch ep 768 for proof. The only identifying screenshot I could get of the bra was without her head on.)

Lil: This recycling underwear thing is GROSS.
Aldi: IDK, I don't think they can top the grossness of having Dr. Hooker reuse it:



Lil: TRUFAX.
Aldi: Put it on Richard for all I care.
Lil: BRAINBLEACH. DAMN YOU ALDI.
Aldi: Muahahahahahaha this needs to be 'shopped now.
Lil: I hate you.

So, ok, not that I put much effort into it AND LIL, YOU MAY THANK THE GODS THAT I DIDN'T FIND A SHOT OF HIM WITH HIS WIFEBEATER OFF, but voila:

Sep. 26th, 2011

Fic: Clock Without Hours (Marc, Deniz; Gen)

Title: Clock Without Hours
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles was zählt; Marc (POV), Deniz, Video!Roman, Florian
Word Count: 2600 words
Rating: Gen
Spoilers: Through 1282. Ish.
Summary: Marc used to be good at time, before That Thing happened.
Disclaimer: These characters belong to RTL.
A/N: Thanks to [info]lilithilien for the super-speedy beta and to [info]alsha for her patient company on my desperate title hunt. (I ended up stealing the title of "Uhr ohne Stunden" by Thomas Godoj, which I thought fit this whole concept really well, although it sounds a lot better in German, lol).



Clock Without Hours )

Sep. 1st, 2011

Fic: Practice Makes Better (Deniz/Roman, PWP)

Title: Practice Makes Better
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters/Pairings: Alles was zählt; Roman/Deniz
Word Count: 2,700
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: PWP, spanking, mild D/s
Summary: Roman has control issues. Deniz doesn't mind.
Disclaimer: The characters of Alles was zählt belong to RTL.
Author's Notes: Thanks and smooches to my wonderful beta [info]lilithilien <333333 Set after and inspired by episode 834 where everything is awesome and nobody at all dies, okay! This is my fifth attempt at cranking out something for the [info]bbtp_challenge and I am happy to report it contains no angst, no plot and no redeeming qualities whatsoever :p

Practice Makes Better )

May. 28th, 2011

Fic: Fire & Ice - Chapter 3: Maybe For Real

For [info]alsha.

Title: Fire & Ice - Chapter 3: Maybe For Real [WIP, 4/12]
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters/Pairings: Alles was zählt; Marc/Tom, Roman, Deniz, Isabelle, Lena, Ingo
Word Count: ~7,300
Rating: NC-17 (maybe? maybe R. RATINGS ARE SO CONFUSING, YOU GUYS.)
Summary: A question is answered, and Lena meddles, but nobody minds.
Disclaimer: The characters of Alles was zählt belong to RTL, more’s the pity.
Author’s Notes: Thanks to [info]lilithilien for being an awesome beta as usual! One day I will compile a handy master list for previous chapters, but today is not that day.

Chapter 3: Maybe For Real )

May. 25th, 2011

Ducks, Injuries, and Goodbyes

Various and sundry updatey stuff:

-Buffy, duck. -Huh?? There's a duck? )

Allein, allein! )

Undead cabbie )

Goodbye to AWZ, again )


Off to write fic and curl up with cats. Rainy winter is rainy.

May. 23rd, 2011

Fic: Fire & Ice - Chapter 2: Essen, Again

For [info]alsha.

Title: Fire & Ice - Chapter 2: Essen, Again [WIP, 3/12]
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters/Pairings: Alles was zählt; Marc/Tom, Deniz/Roman, Isabelle, Ingo, Annette, Lena, Florian, most of the WG & Co. gang except for Franziska because she bores me stiff.
Word Count: ~7,200
Rating: PG (IDK if this applies. I have no idea how to rate anything that's not graphic porn :p)
Summary: "Essen meant failure, the past, hostile ground. Essen meant all of the risks and none of the payoff." (Alternative summary: Roman decides to drop out of the skating business and write self-help books about cross-generational dating instead. Yessssssss.)
Disclaimer: The characters of Alles was zählt belong to RTL, more’s the pity.
Author’s Notes: Previous instalments are here and here. Thanks to [info]lilithilien for her awesome beta skills (and this after she just edited a novel!) and also for providing lots of handy canon for Marc in Five Times Marc Hagendorf Called Roman Wild, which still rocks my socks off. Also thanks to [info]momogermany for various inspiration during Drabble Day!

Chapter 2: Essen, Again )

May. 21st, 2011

Fic: Fire & Ice - Chapter 1: Don't Be A Douche, And Other Helpful Advice

For [info]alsha.

Title: Fire & Ice - Chapter 1: Don't Be A Douche, And Other Helpful Advice [WIP, 2/12]
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters/Pairings: Alles was zählt; Marc/Tom, smidgeon of Deniz/Roman. Isabelle, Ingo, Annette, Lena, Vanessa.
Word Count: ~5,300
Rating: PG
Summary: A party is planned, and Ingo fails at life.
Disclaimer: The characters of Alles was zählt belong to RTL, more’s the pity.
Author’s Notes: Previous instalment is here. Big thanks to [info]lilithilien for the supersonic speed beta!

Chapter 1: Don't Be A Douche, And Other Helpful Advice )

May. 19th, 2011

Fic: Fire & Ice - Prologue (Ice)

For [info]alsha, with love.

Title: Fire & Ice - Prologue (Ice) [WIP, 1/12]*
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters/Pairings: Alles was zählt; Marc/Tom (with appearances from just about everyone else eventually, I'm sure).
Word Count: ~3,000
Rating: PG
Summary: Marc and Tom have baggage. Enough to fill a whole suite.
Disclaimer: The characters of Alles was zählt belong to RTL, more’s the pity.
Author’s Notes: Takes place after the events of Slayer and Not My Type. Thanks to [info]lilithilien for the quick and ever-brilliant beta (and especially for providing the summary)! Very original series title was shamelessly nabbed from a Drabble Day prompt.

*TWELVE CHAPTERS IS MY MASTER PLAN AND NOTHING SHALL MESS WITH IT. THERE SHALL BE NO SUDDEN CHAPTER EXPLOSIONS OR EXTRA POVs RUDELY SHOULDERING IN. TWELVE. TWEEEEEELVE.


Prologue (Ice) )

May. 17th, 2011

DRABBLE DAY FUCK YEAH BRILLIANT

I AM FINALLY CAUGHT UP ON READING ALL THE DRABBLES AND HOPEFULLY COMMENTING ON EVERYTHING AND ASAJOSJALKSJAKLSJAKLSJAKLSJALKJKAKLSJAL OMG YOU GUYS. SO MUCH AWESOMESAUCE. ALL THE CRACK! ALL THE WOOBIE! ALL THE WONDERFUL AUs AND OTPs AND FUCK YEAH, ESKIMO CANON IS THE ONLY CANON!! MY MIND MAY BE PERMANENTLY BLOWN BUT IT WAS FUCKING WORTH IT. AYAYAYAYAYAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!

I THOUGHT YOU SHOULD KNOW.

*SLUMPS*

May. 9th, 2011

Fic: The Moves of Jennifer Steinkamp (Roman, Jenny, Lars, pre-canon)

Happy belated birthday, Momo!! I'm sorry I'm so late - this turned out a wee bit longer than planned. :p


Title: The Moves of Jennifer Steinkamp
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles was zählt; Roman Wild, Jennifer Steinkamp, Lars Berger. PAUL PRADEL PAUL PRADEL PAUL PRADEL. (Shup. His 2-3 mentions totes make him a main character in this. YES THEY DO.)
Word Count: ~13,000
Rating: PG
Summary: This is the story of the second time Roman fell in love, which means, naturally, that this is a story all about Jennifer Charlotte Annabelle Steinkamp.
Disclaimer: The characters of Alles was zählt belong to RTL, more’s the pity.
Author’s Notes: Back when AWZ canon was awesomely layered and generally consistent, there was a wealth of intriguing backstory to explore, including two things that have always nagged at me insistently:
1) Roman has admitted to having been genuinely in love three times (ep356). With Marc and Deniz taking the first and third spot, I’ve always wondered about No. 2 (no, bloody Andrew doesn't count :p).
2) The events unfolding between Jenny and Lars when they first met, and Roman’s extreme insistence that the Steinkamps not hire Lars in the late 500s. Details were required.
Also, those who have watched the early AWZ eps might recognise a certain stunt that Jenny pulled on Diana once. I liked the idea that she might’ve learned it from Roman.
Huge thanks to my wonderful brainthird [info]lilithilien for her super-speedy beta! <333

It's too long for IJ, so...

(Read The Moves of Jennifer Steinkamp at AO3)

And for those who care about such things, this is the piece I had in mind for Jenny's competition music:

Mar. 14th, 2011

Fanart, crack, HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIL: Stella's Moving Topstory

Happy VERY BELATED BIRTHDAY, [info]lilithilien! Or, you know, random mid-March BECAUSE-YOU-ARE-AWESOME present ;)

Title: The Very Awesome, Serious And Dramatic, Not At All Ridiculous REAL Topstory of 2010!!!!!!
Artist: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles Was Zählt, Stella, Lars, Roman, Deniz, Oliver
Medium: Comic
Rating: PG for upsetting depictions of roadkill
Warnings: Stella. Exclamation mark abuse. Artfail (but who cares about Oliver, right?) DRAMATIC comic EMPHASIS!!!!
Disclaimer: These characters belong to RTL.
Artist's notes: Inspired by RTL.de's hilariously simplistic summary of Stella's wheelchair ordeal. I meant to colour it, I did. But GIMP fail and laziness prevailed. Just think of it as a comic noir :p

My IJ layout doesn't like the sizing, so here, have a direct cracklink!

Feb. 7th, 2011

Three Drabbles: Power of Three (Maximilian/Bergmann Sisters)

Because [info]lilithilien pimped the PORN SUNDAY that [info]torino10154 pimped (although it should really be called "anti-porn Sunday", I was all manner of confused thinking "OH YAY, the church is embracing pr0n now??...oh huh, maybe not"), so I felt compelled to drabble drunkenly, which is really the extent of effort any American church-propelled motion deserves:

Title: Power of Three
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Character(s)/Pairing(s): Alles was zählt; Maximilian/Lena, Maximilian/Annette, Maximilian/Katja
Summary: Three sisters, and one man on a tireless hunt for the one that is his match in every greasy, gross, and graceless way.
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 300 words (three drabbles)
Author's Notes: Het. Greasy Max. No. I really have no excuse whatsoever, unless Ballantine's does refunds on bad porn :p


Power of Three )

Feb. 5th, 2011

Poking at podfic: Share (Deniz/Roman/Marc)

Okay, I finally got myself a semi-decent mic so I could experiment with podfic. "EXPERIMENT" BEING THE OPERATIVE WORD HERE, LOL.

So here's a first attempt - I'm still not entirely happy with how much breathing and mic noise there is but eh, I'm just trying things out. I welcome, and in fact encourage/solicit/beg for concrit, especially regarding reading speed, breathing advice, length of pauses, can one follow it, etc. (I tried to find [info]paraka's excellent podfic tutorial that I *thought* was on [info]eskimo_kiss but I guess it must be on [info]no7_awz and I failed at unearthing it, so I pretty much just played it by ear.)

A couple of notes:

1. I deliberately picked something with little to no dialogue because I don't think I can do AWZ voices. Especially considering they're supposed to be in German really, lol. It just messes my head up.

2. In a similar vein, I tend to pronounce the names the German way, even though it kinda messes with the reading flow because I have to shift my voice apparatus mid-sentence, which often results in awkward pauses. But I can't really bring myself to say "Roman" the English way, it just sounds silly to me *facepalms*

Alright, here goes!

Title: Share
Author: [info]aldiara
Reader: [info]aldiara
Rating: R
Pairing: Deniz/Roman/Marc
Fandom: Alles Was Zählt
Disclaimer: Not mine, I just wish.
Summary: Deniz knows that they're good at this and getting better, but somehow that doesn't make it easier. Not even a little, not even at all.
Download format: wav file, 27.61 MB, 10 mins, 56 secs

Listen to it here

or

Download file here

Jan. 11th, 2011

HoFest gift claiming: Oh Right, There Was Another One

*shamelessly clutters up f-list*

I suppose it's too late to pretend I didn't write fic with Mars in it. lololol.


Title: Rock 'n' Roll Dreams Come True
Author: [info]aldiara
Character(s)/Pairing(s): Deniz/Roman, and… ??? [surprise!]
Summary: When Deniz inadvertently finds Two Tickets To That Thing He Loves instead of his favourite cock ring, he and Roman embark on a grim adventure of ear-raping agony that eventually leads to a chance encounter with DESTINY.
Rating: PG-13. Alas, no actual ear rape occurs.
Warning(s): Mars. Loquaciousness, soap plots, crack. Hm, better safe than sorry: THIS FIC CONTAINS NARRATION AND DIALOGUE, REPRESENTED BY LETTERS ON A SCREEN. CORRECT GRAMMAR MAY OCCUR. ALSO, MARRRRS.
Word Count: 3500
Author's Notes: Originally written as a pinch hit for HoHoHo Fest. Thanks to my wonderful cheerleading beta [info]lilithilien! And shoutouts go to Queer As Folk (UK) and The Shoebox Project, from which I've rudely stolen a couple of lines. Also, I blame someone else for Mars. Someone not me. You know who you are. (Hint: [info]alsha[info]alsha it's [info]alsha :p)

Rock 'n' Roll Dreams Come True )

~~~

why o why do i not have a mars icon o the shame

Jan. 9th, 2011

Fic: Slayer – Love Hurts (And Then The Mop Goes Into The Dragon) (DeRo, Marc, Isabelle, Tom; NC-17)

The reveals for HoFest went up, so I can finally claim & repost this leviathan fic! On Archive of Our Own, mind, because it's way too long for IJ. FTR, I've done some final tweaking on it because I was looking at it during HoFest and found a few mistakes so this is a slightly cleaned-up version.


Photobucket



Title: Slayer – Love Hurts (And Then The Mop Goes Into The Dragon)
Author: [info]aldiara
Character(s)/Pairing(s): Roman Wild, Deniz Öztürk, Marc Hagendorf, Isabelle Steinkamp, Tom Reichenbach, Vanessa Steinkamp, Florian Wild, Marian Öztürk; Deniz/Roman, *Roman/Marc, Marc/Tom* [highlight for hinted-at other pairings]
Summary: Being an account of what transpired at the Öztürk/Wild household and elsewhere after certain events inconveniently recalling the recent past. A story involving ice musicals, skating games, bitchy skaters, clueless computer nerds, stage drama, porn, dragons, horses, untimely revelations, need for closure, questionable likelihood of attaining closure, and Many Many Issues.
Rating: NC-17
Warning(s): Excessive musical cheesiness. Defilement of sacred kitchen appliances.
Word Count: 44,000
Author's Notes: Originally written as a gift for [info]ktbob (<3333333333) during HoHoHo Fest on [info]no7_awz and posted here. Diverges from canon sometime past episode 1020, although Jenny's disappearance still happened. For the purposes of this fic, Katja never returned from Halle, and the Frank=Franziska reveal took place earlier than in canon. All ludicrous flaws regarding descriptions of skating, localities and ice show production belong to author.
Special thanks: 1) To my wonderful brainthird [info]lilithilien for agreeing to beta this monster and offering some incredibly useful and necessary suggestions. 2) To DG, for the dragon, for the musical plot (modified by me, because every GBWI story needs a totalitarian overlord complex bitch queen), for the title and the inspiration. 3) To [info]alsha, for the cheerleading, for helping with that dratted scene, for a dragon named Yuri. 4) To [info]ktbob, for ranting in the comments of ep915 that the only acceptable answer to the question "What changed?" should have been "I did."

~~~

Read "Slayer" here @ AO3


Aaaaaaaand here's the playbill, lovingly designed by the fabulous Lil! *explodes in spontaneous bursts of squeeeeeeeeee and love* )

~~~

Jan. 8th, 2011

Fic: Not My Type (Tom/Marc, English version)

Title: Not My Type
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters/Pairings: Alles Was Zählt; Marc Hagendorf; Tom/Marc
Word Count: 2400
Rating: Mature but non-explicit. IDK.
Summary: A quick list of all the reasons why Tom Reichenbach is really not Marc's type and why he'll end this strange little intermezzo next weekend. Definitely. Probably. Well, maybe. Hm.
Warnings: First person narration. Schmoopier than usual.
Disclaimer: These characters belong to RTL, who seem to prefer to pretend that Marc Hagendorf never existed. I happen to think that's a colossal mistake, but hey. WE CAN FIX.
Author's Notes: Deutsche Version hier. A little by-product of Slayer, although I think it probably works as a standalone, too. Takes place a few months after the events of Slayer. Thanks to [info]alsha for beta-ing my translation! <333


Not My Type )

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