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Apr. 12th, 2009

Really quick recaps: Episodes 651-654

So. I've just whizzed through this week's eps in one go because I haven't had time to watch them, and I definitely don't have time to do detailed recaps, which is probably all for the best, because except for the odd Roman or Lars/Jenny scene, they were largely boring.

So I'll just do a really quick summary of what happened (as far as I even remember):

In which nothing much happens )

[Lil: 652, 653, 654]
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Apr. 5th, 2009

Recap: Episode 650 - Too Much of Everything Lame

Is it just me or have the previouslys grown longer? It's obviously just me because I can look at the runtime on my screen, but... maybe it's just because what they're recounting is so boring. That seemed to take ages.

I nearly put myself to sleep recapping this )

[Lil: DDNN]
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Apr. 3rd, 2009

Recap: Episode 649 - Stella Knows All. Bow to the Power of Stella! Or else.

Previously on AWZ, Vanessa turned into the Stepford Daughter.

And Mike was an idiot. AND STELLA WAS WISE. )

[Lil: MRA-NE but might need cause of shout-out line]

Apr. 2nd, 2009

Recap: Episode 648

Hah hah. So I was watching my daft soap, cackling quietly to myself, when my cat came in, yowled loudly, tried to throw himself across my keyboard and batted at the screen just when boring!Oliver was on it. I thought at first he was just trying to alert me to the fact that I was watching crap (HELLO CAT, I KNOW THIS!) and possibly hitting on boring!Oliver in disturbing inter-species fangirling manner, but it turns out he'd brought something to show me, and it was so tiny I hadn't noticed it at first:

*is dead from cute* Cat is mostly toothless, and a wimp, so it wasn't hurt, just scared, and now safely released far from cat.

Which means I'm out of excuses not to catch up on this episode. SIGH.

Dear AWZ: Update your credits already, you lazy sods. )

Can we have Roman back tomorrow, please?

[Lil: DNN. Unless we want Deniz in his eskimo hoodie *loves*]
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Recap: Episode 647

Vanessa's back! HAI, GIRLFRIEND! LOOKING GOOD!

Otherwise, this was meh, so let's be brief: )

Also, boy did I ever enjoy the soothing absence of Ingo/Annette/Christian. Not that I expect it to last or anything. Sigh.

Also also, WHERE IS OUR BUNNY! Unless he's off having a hot fling and we get evidence of same sometime soon, his absence is NOT ACCEPTABLE.

[Lil: DNN. Unless we want semi-naked Deniz.]
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Recap: Episode 646

OMG, I'm three eps behind in watching, and I totally blame the SEXYs:


(Go check out the fic! The art! The vids! The icons! And if you don't delve even a little bit beyond your own fandom, Jenny will make her FLOATING AXE COME AFTER YOU! *has spent all night cheerfully digging through nom list*

Anyway, if I don't start catching up now, I'm going to be too daunted by the prospect of recapping and I'll just break down and yell "STUFF HAPPENED, OKAY! DON'T ASK ME WHAT!", so....

Previously on AWZ, a couple of episodes were decently watchable and a dedicated helpline had to be set up to help viewers cope with this staggering development.

Then Lars and Jenny were scorching, Deniz was cute (what? yes!), and Juli was funny (WHAT?? YES!). )

[Lil: .....there is no Roman, so technically it's a DNN, but... we might need it for Deniz. YES I KNOW. Don't even. But... HE'S TOO CUTE!]
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Mar. 28th, 2009

Recap: Episode 645... is not bad. It's actually almost good. WTF??

Previously on AWZ, Roman invited Ingo to his bed and Ingo was just about to say "Okay... I've fought this long enough," when Christian showed up and interrupted.

For this, he must die. )

Dude. This was watchable. Mostly. I need a drink to absorb the shock.

Lil: OMGMHT

Mar. 27th, 2009

Recap: Episode 644 - Ringo, Ringo, Ringo all the way!

644? You know, that's a whole bunch of episodes. And what saddens me is that if we rewound 300 of them, we'd already be at a stage where things had distinctly begun to suck. That's 300 eps of suckage, give or take. THAT'S A LOT OF SUCKAGE.

Previously on AWZ, Juli was abducted by evil ectoplasm. In order to survive, she had to delve into previously unknown reservoirs of inner strength and coolness and turned into a kickass heroine of madly interesting proportions.

Or, you know, she got a letter from a bank and fought with her boring boyfriend.

AND INGO CAME BACK! )

Lil: MHT
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Mar. 26th, 2009

Recap: Episode 643, In Which There Is More Cooing.

Previously on AWZ, the writers discovered the secret of alchemy and used it to turn gold into shit. Repeatedly.

[Dude, I just realised this ep has no Stella and no Deniz and should, therefore, surely be somewhat decent by default. BUT NO SUCH LUCK.]

Let's pretend stealing baby saliva is a plot, shall we? )

[Lil: DNN.]
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Mar. 25th, 2009

Recap: Episode 642

(Sorry, this icon has nothing whatsoever to do with today's plot. I just can't be arsed to make an icon of Stella with her face crossed out or something.)

Previouslys: Everyone acted like morons.

Today: Everyone still acts like morons. )

[Lil: MRA-NE]
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Mar. 24th, 2009

Recap: Episodes 640 & 641, and a rant

Oh god, good thing I don't have much time. If I went into detail on these, I'd doubtlessly be frothing at the mouth.

Instead, let's shoot some bullets:


Dear writers : Try something fucking NEW, I beg you. I haven't sat through Roman/Deniz/Vanessa only to watch you pull the exact same crap on Jenny/Lars/Stella )

[Lil: MRA-NE]
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Mar. 20th, 2009

Recap: Episode 639 - Blair Witch Baby!

Today's episode is hilariously titled "Will Lena survive the birth?" right above a picture of a beaming and clearly surviving Lena with a pink thing. Yeah, the suspense is killing me, alright.

Cracky birth episode of doom )

[Lil: DNN]
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Mar. 19th, 2009

Recap: Episode 638 - Labouring Through

(what! I live with the world's worst punster. It rubs off.)

You know, I'm kinda glad this show is bad at the moment. I've got so many timelines flying round my head (early DeRo for subs, early Deva for subs, mid-DeVa for clipping cues, early early eps for shallow entertainment [Ben is so gross], rentboy period for fic) that if the current ones were awesome, I don't think I could cope. Of course that shall not stop me from bashing the hell out of them for sucking anyway.

This is... too bad for a witty lj cut caption, actually. On the upside, there is no Stella. )

[Lil: DNN]
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Mar. 18th, 2009

Recap: Ep 637 - Lena has to FLEE TO ITALY!

I want a spin-off for this show. I want Roman and Lars and Jenny to go on tour together and go to Düsseldorf and VL, where Roman hooks up with Gregor. I want Stella and Juli and Oliver and Celine and Zoe and boring!Max and Christian to go away and never come back. I want Diana to come back, and also Tim. I want Roman to have a love life. I want a slow build-up to a long, drawn-out, conflicted DeRo reunion. I want a puppy.

Instead, I get conversations about knobs and people FLEEING TO ITALY. )

[Lil: Do Not Need.]
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Mar. 17th, 2009

Recap: Episode 636 - Bracelet, Blackmail, Baby, Blah

Max and Lena yell at each other over the baby for about fifteen minutes out of 23. Including hysterical screaming and violent shaking and literal hair-tearing. This child is going to have such a lovely, stable environment to grow up in, I can just tell. The long and short of it is that Lena feels threatened by frustrated Max and cries buckets. Mike's brilliant solution: "You and I have to run away. Somewhere no one will find us." Oh brother.

Meanwhile, Stella has accepted Jenny's blackmail terms (bracelet in exchange for Stella buggering off) and is about to go back to the circus but Marian talks her out of it with a gag-worthy speech of "My god-daughter's not a quitter!" and "Skating is your dream!" I do believe he has it in his contract these days that he must not have any dialogue unless it's to or about Stella. Also, why the hell won't anyone ever let Stella go back to the circus?? This is about the fifth time that she tried!

Deniz is a giant tool again, whining at Lars about Jenny being a bitch - and yes, he's right about Jenny slipping Stella the stupid wallet, but he is being such a spazzy, immature prat over it, and it's all flailing and overacted and I want to smack every one of his expressions off his face. Definitely no Deniz love today. As a result, he gets himself suspended from training for a week and hangs around No.7 being by turns mopey and aggressive, i.e. BAD COMBINATION BOYFRIEND. Get the hell off the screen and have your hissy fits somewhere else pls.

Stella, persuaded by Marian, gets her bitchface on and decides to take Jenny on. And you know what? Bitchy!Stella is about five dozen times more convincing than perky!Stella or heart-of-gold!Stella. I don't think it's projection. She's coolly threatening and genuinely nasty and I BELIEVE HER. I want a role reversal instead of a Jenny/Diana reprise, please! It could so freaking work. It could make for such a cool story if Jenny had finally grown enough to be a semi-decent person and was trying to make life work for her the nice way and then along comes someone who made her life hell just the way she used to do it to other people. Simply rehashing the exact same old trope is just... lame. But whatever. It's not like I'm surprised.

Right, plot. Stella confronts Jenny in the locker rooms and gets her to chat about her little intrigue, but Marian is behind the shower curtain with a recorder and gets the whole thing on tape, so now Jenny's in trouble. Bleck.

Two cute scenes in this entire ep: 1. Short scene with Jenny and Lars in the bathroom where he nuzzles flirtily into her hair and actually laughs (that is still a rare enough sight that it's doubly cute when he does).

2. Skating scene with Jenny and Roman while Lars watches. Ok, the skating itself is kind of a bust because it just being a training session, they didn't go to much effort to do cool things, and the doubles are pretty visible. But then Jenny wanders off to talk to Stella and Lars tells Roman to carry on by himself, and Roman's like, "What, alone?" and Lars yells, "Yeah, totally alone! You are alone! Alone! Alone!" and does this weird little jazzhands/dancy thing with it. And again, he is GRINNING. If he weren't so cute, this could be a cruel meta thing re: Roman's romantic life, but as it is, I just sat there and giggled with him while Roman rolled his eyes and flipped him the finger. Heeeh!

Otherwise, it was the worst episode all week, oh wait, the week's just started. Bummer.
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Mar. 16th, 2009

AWZ catch-up post for [info]graspthethorn

This post is for the lovely and insane [info]graspthethorn who has been eaten by the Merlin Armer Gayms these many weeks, which once again proves that Merlin steals everyone away from the AWZ fandom, lol! Yet you cannot be mad at it because it is too adorable *cuddles Merlin and its shiny happy slashpile* Anyway, even if you have no idea WTH these gayms are all about, go check out the entries for the first round (? is it?) because they are all MADE OF AWESOME. And don't consume any beverages while you look at them because they will totally end up snorted all over your keyboards.

Getting side-tracked already and I haven't yet started, for shite! (Side-track from the side-track: My cat just came bounding in with a stick in his mouth. Yes. My cat. Brought in a stick. SPECIES CONFUSION FTW!)

ANYWAY. This is just a quick Catch Up On AWZ Post for Rose that the rest of you may and will ignore at leisure. )
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Mar. 14th, 2009

Recap: Episode 635 - Yes, Deniz, you ARE worst nightmare potential, but not how you think

Previously on AWZ: Absolutely sod all of actual interest happened.

Why would you never get enough of this? Whyyyy? )

In conclusion, the bathtub scene is the only one worth watching, really. Because, just LOOK AT JENNY'S SKIN.
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Mar. 13th, 2009

Recap: Episode 634 - YAWN.

Meh. I've already wasted 23 minutes on this lame crap, so I'll keep it short today.

Why the hell is that bracelet worth 7000 euros?? )

BETTER PLOT NEXT TIME PLS!
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Mar. 12th, 2009

Recap: Episode 633 - Bleck, Stella and her Bracelet of Woe, AGAIN

Previouslys: Jenny tried to strangle Stella (oh that she had succeeded), Lena is PREGNANT DID YOU KNOW? Simone and Juli are fighting over some bank.

Some chick can't ever get enough. I'd point and laugh but... look at me.

Lars touches Roman all over. That's the only scene anyone needs to see. )

For a by-and-large boring ep, this recap was way too long. *puts leash on self*

Mar. 11th, 2009

Recap: Episode 632 - Annette is annoying

Did you guys know that Juli runs a bank now? Because I didn't! I sure am glad that they mentioned it here because otherwise I might have missed it!

Why can't Roman have a nice fling, whyyyyy?? )
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