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Jul. 1st, 2013

Obsessions, Rambling, A Poll, Fic and Sundry

Insert the usual flailing about how IJ is too neglected etc., yadda blah blah introcakes.

Stuff I've been up to lately mostly involves telly and reading and then some more reading, and also a whole lot of hating on the concept of winter. WHO CAME UP WITH THAT SHIT. I want to be warm again, please! And yeah, I know, winters where I live are ridiculously mild, but that doesn't really help when all the houses are built like we're in the tropics and everyone around just shrugs and goes, "Eh, put on an extra jumper, you'll be golden." I DO NOT WISH TO BE GOLDEN IN AN EXTRA JUMPER. I WISH TO BE GOLDEN IN A TANK TOP WITH THE HEAT ON HIGH WITHOUT MY POWER BILL LEAPING BY 5000%.

Ahem. Yeah. Winter Is Not Hot.


Show-that-was marathon )

Talk about fandom behaviours, and also a poll )

Writing and fic round-up )

Dec. 10th, 2012

No idea where that came from

lol, so I had a dream about Show-that-was and I wanted to write it down - I don't think anyone but [info]winterlover gives a damn anymore so I was going to tweet it at her but I can't be arsed to split it up into tweetable portions.

So Seth from Misfits was on AWZ playing the new bartender at No.7:


He was a dark and crooked dude with lots of shady ulterior motives for being there. One of them was someone was paying him to seduce and/or get close to Deniz, because reasons. Meanwhile, Deniz's friends (well, yeah, it was a dream, so he had friends :p) were pushing him to go out with Seth because he was still all broken and angry and depressed and hadn't been dating in ages (again, DREAM) and they were worried about him and thought it was time he got back out there.

So Deniz really didn't want to but Seth kept pursuing him and his friends kept pushing him so eventually he agreed to one date, which was at No.7 of all places (of course) but they ended up staying long after everyone else had left and had this really intense exchange over drinks that turned into a messy twisty angry fling thing, and then afterwards Deniz stumbled out of the bar and ran off into the dark and then later he told Seth it'd been a mistake and he wasn't interested in anything right now, and Seth was all annoyed and confused because fuck, he actually liked Deniz, but fuck, ulterior motive, stay focused, and yeah. It was twisted and lovely and fucked up and much as I appreciate all that, I'm not sure I needed a reminder, lol.

But man, those two were hot together. #shallow

Jan. 4th, 2012

Fic: In This Home On Ice – Chapter Eight: Change on the Fly (Femslash Ficathon 2011)

Title: In This Home On Ice – Chapter Eight: Change on the Fly
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles Was Zählt, Vanessa, Deniz
Word Count: ~2500 words
Rating: G
Summary: The problem with Öztürks is they’re not half as stupid as they look.
Disclaimer: Sadly I don't own these characters; I just like watching them fight.
A/N: LA TEE DA. Eventually I will finish this, it might just take a decade :p Massive thanks to [info]alsha for her insightful last-minute beta, and to the AWZ Femslash Ficathon for reminding me this thing existed and I Had Plans For It. The master list for previous instalments is here, but for all those who don’t want to bother rereading 70k words to remember what the deal is (WELCOME TO SANITY), here are a few key reminder points for this AU from canon and previous chapters:

This chapter is set in February 2009, a few weeks after Deniz’s HIV scare in Chapter 7. Deniz is nineteen, still primarily interested in ice hockey, has stopped working as a rentboy several months ago, and has had several issues-ridden encounters with a Very Aloof Roman, who is currently dating Swedish photographer Magnus. Vanessa, unrequitedly in love with Oliver Sommer (who is dating Julietta von Altenburg, Vanessa’s cousin and BFF), is helping Oliver get over the drug addiction he acquired in an Asian jail after an abduction courtesy of Simone Steinkamp. Juli is overjoyed at having him back but doesn’t know about the addiction. Deniz is the only one who knows about Vanessa’s crush on Oliver.


In This Home On Ice - Chapter Eight: Change on the Fly )

Jan. 3rd, 2012

Fic: As Dire Chance And Fateful Cockup Would Have It (AWZ, DeRo, LeFlo)

Title: As Dire Chance And Fateful Cockup Would Have It
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles was zählt; Deniz, Roman, Lena, Florian, Alexander (yes, shush), Jenny
Word Count: ~4500 words
Rating: G
Warnings: Schmoop. Mentions of That Thing, though ruthlessly reinterpreted.
Summary: Roman makes it home in time for Christmas. Canine abduction, verbal abuse and terrible tree choices ensue.
Disclaimer: These characters belong to RTL.
A/N: This is for [info]momogermany, whose left knee I now own \o/! Thanks to [info]alsha for beta-ing and for suggesting 32 titles (yes, I counted) before I ignored them all and went with a Billy Mack quote (that has even less to do with the fic than anything that came before it but it sounded fun, so suck it, people.)

Merry Fucking Belated Christmas, Everyone! )

Jan. 2nd, 2011



So it all started out with me being annoyed about Katja's mopey smudgey self in the back of Ben & Izzie's wedding dress. So I started to smudge her out.

Then somehow I ended up giving Izzie fiery phoenix wings. Now I'm craving wingfic!

Then Katja got obliviated in the blazing white blast of Ben & Izzie's joined hands. YAY. CLEAN WHITE LOVE SAVES THE PIC DAY!

Then Ben annoyed me by having flat hair, and by constantly accidentally getting his nose smudged out.



Mar. 16th, 2010

Fic: [info]sdk made me do this

Well, she didn't, really. But it's always handy to have someone to blame, and she did dig out the Diana/Tim/TREE crack.

Okay, somebody demanded the girlslash-on-grave fic in the monster comment thread that my random venting post turned into the other week, and now I can't find where and who BECAUSE THERE ARE 70 COMMENTS BECAUSE YOU PEOPLE ARE NUTS.

So I'll just chuck it up here since it was never posted in public FOR VERY GOOD REASON, lol. I wrote this in a YouTube PM sometime last year whilst high on caffeine, so yeah. I'm just gonna blame one of my clones for it.

Title: Earthbound
Authors: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles Was Zählt, Annette/Diana
Word Count: 1200 words
Rating: So very wrong. (yes, that means NC-17).
Summary: When your fiancé's getting bad haircuts in heaven, what can you do but screw your best friend on his grave?
Disclaimer: Sometimes Show is so glad that it's not owned by me.
A/N: Set after the whacky grave-digging shenanigans somewhere in the mid-540s. Originally written for the sole and private purpose of amusing terrorising [info]graspthethorn. I miss you, Rosebach. Please be okay.

Earthbound )
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Jan. 16th, 2010

Why my fandom is the sparkliest ever in the world

Sep. 3rd, 2009

"So what the hell is this? German soap? WTF?"

Okay, so I am really restraining myself and trying to be good and not making my only LJ/IJ/DW posts about OMG NOT THE BLOODY SOAP AGAIN AND GAH THERE SHE GOES AGAIN WITH THE VIDSPAM, but sorry, I am incapable of not spreading the joy of this.




Aug. 22nd, 2009

Giddy fandom squeeeee

Oh boys. How are you so awesome? And what in the hell do you expect me to bitch about when everything just sounds FANTASTIC??

Also, Igor's dog = <333333333333333333333333333333333

Aug. 13th, 2009

Pics that make me happy :D

In a totally non-cynical, non-"I-wonder-if-they'll-fuck-this-up", non-cautious, non-anything-but-utter-blissful-squeeeeeeeee way. I just look at it and grin stupidly. ALL THE TIME.




May. 29th, 2009

One of these days...

I swear I'm going to do an actual update. I swear I will. As per usual, it will probably start with "I AM ALIVE".

In the meantime, though, my show made my head explode today. In a good way. OMFG.

Nicht so.  )

May. 12th, 2009

Random musings re: current treatment of DeRo history on AWZ

You know what I find interesting? Where a while ago, it looked like the show was trying hard to make viewers forget Deniz and Roman were ever an item at all, lately there have been all sorts of references to the DeRo history... people casually mentioning that they used to be an item, the whole Bulle revival, and both of them being referred to as each other's ex-boyfriends a whole bunch of times by now. Meanwhile, the Deniz/Vanessa scene the other day was the first acknowledgement in AGES that they ever even used to date. It's a very strange juxtaposition to the early days of DeVa when that pairing was being pushed and pushed as the OTP (regardless of utter lack of romantic connection there) and DeRo kept getting dismissed as a lust/obsession/pity thing at best. So it's strange now to almost see DeRo treated as the "serious" relationship in retrospect and DeVa dismissed entirely - I know it's just wishful thinking but it's almost as if they realised that was a huge mistake and are rewriting history or something.

And I'm not saying that means a DeRo revival or anything at all - I'm just wondering if this is going anywhere in terms of Deniz's sexuality. Especially since his supposed gloominess over Stella has lost all believability lately, to the point where even Vanessa (who really hasn't spent any time with him in ages, unlike Roman) questions that he would be feeling shitty over STELLA.

In general, I am bemused but pleased over the way things have been going lately. There's still loads of crack, but whoa... good things are happening! Things that I am interested in following! Things that I wish there was more of! After almost half a year of drought, THIS IS REFRESHING AND STRANGE.
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May. 6th, 2009

My obsession, let me show you it.

I seriously need to get organised about Dreamwidth. The thing is, it does take time to actually sit down and organise stuff and time and organisational skills are things that forever elude me. Srsly, I need a personal assistant to organise my life. Or maybe a house elf. Yes. That'd do.

Mainly, I just want everyone to be in one place, lol. I'm already having trouble juggling two journals and scrambling after my fifteen hundred online bases to cover on a regular basis. *grabs people and things of interest and squishes them into same virtual space*

This week, I have been working on my fic! I've hated pretty much every word I've done on it, but hey, words were produced. I think I realised about three quarters of the way through that I have too much boggy detail and that this probably didn't need to be its own chapter, but dammit, I have 10,000 words, I have sweated several bucketfuls of blood to get them, and I am not tossing them, so hah.

It doesn't help when instead of sucking and inspiring me to fix it (as usual), my show is actually being awesome right now. [info]lilithilien and [info]sdk have been busy little beavers subbing recent episodes at Eskimo Kiss Project to have something to counter-balance the suckage of the older ones (DeVa era, joy), and lo and behold, some of the recent ones have been more than watchable. They have actually been good. Like, really really good. This boggles my mind:

Spazzing flail )

May. 2nd, 2009

Ficlet: Hands-On (Deniz/Roman, NC-17) a.k.a. I Fail At Drabbles

Title: Hands-On
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles Was Zählt, Deniz/Roman
Word Count: 1400 words (i.e. STILL TOO FREAKING LONG FOR A DRABBLE)
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Deniz is totally straight, and totally over Roman, except when he's fantasising about him, of course. (Shelly's Alternative Summary: DENIZ VANKS WANKS.)
Warnings: Mild dub-con fantasy.
Disclaimer: These characters are owned by RTL, who don't believe in phone sex, or in wanking. WHAT'S WRONG WITH THEM?
A/N: This is a follow-up piece to my phonesex fic Hands-free, based on another prompt from the lovely [info]sdk. This one was: I'M DYING FOR A DENIZ-WANKS-THINKING-ABOUT-DOM!ROMAN-PHONE!SEX FROM YOUR FIC HANDS-FREE. HAHAH I WANT FANFIC FOR YOUR FANFIC PLS. ALSO I LIKE WANKING. HAHAHA. Hope this hits the spot, Schatz! Unbeta'd, so please do point out any errors that I may have missed because certain ppl in certain chatrooms were being DEMANDING.

Photobucket Photobucket Photobucket
Photobucket Photobucket Photobucket

Hands-On )

Apr. 30th, 2009

Ficlet of silly for [info]sdk

Title: Stuff About Things
Author: [info]aldiara
Fandom/Characters: Alles Was Zählt, Marian, Deniz (established Deniz/Roman)
Word Count: 1500 words (i.e. TOO FREAKING LONG FOR A DRABBLE)
Rating: PG-13? I HAVE NO IDEA.
Summary: Marian doesn't want to know, okay? Except maybe he does. A little. BUT NOT. (Shelly's Alternative Summary: Marian would like to have gay sex with Etienne. Even though Etienne doesn't show up in this fic.)
Disclaimer: These characters are owned by RTL, who make them do dreadful things. DREADFUL.
A/N: For the lovely [info]sdk, maker of glorious icons, co-defeater of WMG copyright bastards, and all around shiny awesome person. The prompt she gave me involved Marian awkwardly asking Deniz about gay sex because he is curious because of his own repressed gay love for Etienne. Unfortunately I totally failed at the Etienne part because apparently I just can’t write Marian as gay, LOL. But I hope you’ll like it anyway!


Stuff About Things (That Marian Öztürk Will Never Bring Up At Breakfast Ever Again) )

Apr. 29th, 2009


DUDE. I may not have time for recaps, but I need to bitch. There's only so much venting I can let out in YouTube comments, and also, they have that pesky character limit.

Specifically, I need to bitch about this:

Hai Jenny and your idiotic screenshot. I'm telling you, YouTube hates us. Even if it's a clip with gorgeous DeRo scenes, the screenshots it picks will invariable feature 1) someone's face frozen in a retarded expression 2) Mike or 3) NINA (it is all over Nina. If there's a 10-minute clip that features 2 seconds of Nina, you can be sure there will be a Nina screenshot).

But that's not what I'm here to bitch about. I'm not even here to bitch about Deniz being the biggest tool in the scarily enormous AWZ toolbox (hello boy-who-used-to-be-sensitive/conflicted/occasionally sweet, I miss you!) or about how Roman is clearly still not impervious to him no matter how much he might want to be (seriously, Roman, just smack him one in his pretty, sneering mouth. It'll make you feel so much better!) I am NOT EVEN HERE to bitch about Vanessa and what a completely pathetic shadow of her former character she is these days or how she is still given the crappiest, crappiest love interests ever in the world. No no. I am SERENE AND CALM about these things, oh yes.

The thing I'm here to bitch about is Stella/Lars.

Dear Show,

OMG. WTF? I know I didn't exactly have grand expectations of your set-up for this pairing being believable and engaging. And it won't be a secret to anyone reading this journal that I've loathed Stella and the way she was forced into this show pretty much from the get-go. And yes, I happen to think Lars and Jenny are awesome together and make an intriguing pairing exactly because they are both so messed up. So yeah, I am about as biased as it gets and there was admittedly little chance that I would give Stella/Lars much of a real chance to impress me. However. When I set my standard for the development of that relationship low, I was unaware that the development stage WAS GOING TO BE SKIPPED ENTIRELY. What the bleeding hell happened there?

Let's look back. Stella appears on the show and runs into Lars. Lars lends a hand with her daft broken scooter and then disappears. Lars is indifferent to Stella. Later, Lars comes back and engages in a relationship with Jenny. They are passionate yet cautious with their real feelings; tentative, fraught, complicated, yet strangely adorable, and very genuine. Then we have a scene in which Stella runs into Lars and the audio track is overwhelmed with frantic heartbeat sounds, which apparently mean STELLA LOVES LARS NOW. Whatever. Then Stella daydreams a bunch of crap about Lars fondling her. Lars looks disinterested EVEN IN HER OWN DREAMS. Meanwhile in the waking world, Lars is too busy having awesome sex with Jenny and touching Roman a lot more than seems necessary to notice that Stella is PERKY, REFRESHING, GUILELESS-YET-WITTY, LOVABLE, WISE BEYOND HER YEARS and generally 150% MADE OF STICKY-SWEET FAIRY FLOSS. There's some clashing of intentions when Stella offers Lars beer and then overcompensates her apologising; then she attempts to tell him she knows all about his sekrit pain, Lars is pissed off and tells her to shove it, then she goes back to the circus and Lars brings her back, not because he cares but because Jenny asked him to. Then Stella smooches him. Lars goes WTF and tells her to can it. Stella cans it. Stella continues to have heart palpitations around Lars. Lars is oblivious, and also indifferent. Lars is very good at being indifferent. Lars is also layered enough that you can tell when he's being stand-offish to protect the vulnerable core of his brooding heart, and when he's being INDIFFERENT BECAUSE HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY PARTICULAR FEELINGS ABOUT YOU. Lars is also very good at not talking pretty, and at telling people just what exactly he thinks.

Taking all these things into account, when one second Lars is saying "I'm with Jenny" and "Get the hell over it" and the next second he is standing there with his lips hovering a hair's breadth from Stella's, the only logical conclusions I can draw are: 1) Stella's just had a shot of vodka and the alcohol fumes are beckoning him irresistibly 2) Stella's holding a couple of voodoo dolls with her and Lars's hair glued to them behind her back and is at present making them smooch or 3) Show, once again your relationship build-up is RIDICULOUS BEYOND BELIEF.

Look, I don't like this pairing to start with because I think it's lame and predictable and devoid of interest; because it's an exact, play-by-play rehash of Jenny/Julian/Diana and I am already allergic to Stella being sold as the new Diana; because once again, it's breaking up a truly intriguing pairing with intense chemistry for one that is bland as oatmeal (see DeRo vs. DeVa, although sadly I think DeVa even had more chemistry than Stella/Lars);

But all that said, and I know it is a LOT said - how the fuck am I even to give this pairing, little as I like the mere idea, the tiniest chance if I, as a viewer, am given absolutely no genuine, believable set-up whatsoever? Am I really supposed to just swallow this crappy serving of insta!love? From zero to smoochies? I don't freaking think so. I didn't buy it for DeVa, and I'm not buying it now. Give me something to work with, for crying out loud. Something other than THOU MUST LOVE STELLA, FOR SHE ART LOVELY. I know you have these weird ideas about your OTPs being so awesome and self-evident that they don't need any explaining or struggle, but boy, are you ever wrong. CONSISTENCY. SHOW-DON'T-TELL. BELIEVABLE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. LOOK UP THESE CONCEPTS, I BESEECH YOU. I KNOW YOU ARE JUST A FREAKING SOAP AND YOU PROBABLY DON'T GIVE A TOSS. BUT DAMMIT, YOU MADE ME FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU AGAINST MY WILL SO I'M EXPECTING YOU TO BE BETTER THAN THIS. WORK OUT YOUR ISSUES OR I AM GOING TO BE SO VERY CRANKY WITH YOU AND WE WON'T HAVE SEX AGAIN EVER. BELIEVE THIS.

Very little damn love,


Apr. 26th, 2009

This is what I thought all soaps were like...

Goodness. [info]sdk and I were up late last night/this morning/whatever time it was, and feeling gloomy from subbing crappy DeVa episodes for days with hardly a glimpse of light on the horizon (at least until Ingo and Annette showed up), so we were looking for a pick-me-up and decided to give Verbotene Liebe's Tom/Ulli storyline a go. It's an older one (from 10 years ago, I think) and I thought it'd be interesting to see how gay storylines were handled back then. Now of course this is completely subjective, so no offense to anyone who enjoyed that particular storyline, but:

OMG, how bad. LOL. It's not even the repetitiveness of the plot, because I was vaguely aware of that before then, but...

1.) The characters. Uhm. I usually slash everything remotely slashable, but those two? Not a shred of gay. Not a shred of chemistry. Most awkward physicality ever. Dude.

2.) The dialogue. Completely wooden and expositioning wildly all over the place. Also wildly at odds with the acting, because if someone constantly talks about being in love with someone but does it with plasticky expressions and a stiff tone of mild boredom, funnily enough I don't buy the emotion. That was all over the place... so much telling-not-showing going on that it was laughable.

3.) The writing/plot: Probably not as bad as it feels to me right now but so wrapped up in the utter lack of connection between the characters that there's no salvation. Although it was funny to see how similar Ollian was to Tulli. LOL.

So, in short, it was really entertaining, but more in the sense of "howling with laughter at how bad it was". What it did do was give me a renewed sense of respect for how good the falling in love/coming out part of the Ollian story was, and you know what else... by the time we stopped watching these, my current disillusionment with AWZ was completely mended. Completely. I love my show! It's got actual connection between characters! Believable relationships! Snark! Snappy dialogue! Occasionally good pacing! Okay, it's making me want to rip off my scalp off with DeVa right now, but at least it's making me feel something, you know? At least I'm not sitting there giggling amusedly at the characters' supposed deep angst and turmoil.

Apr. 12th, 2009

Really quick recaps: Episodes 651-654

So. I've just whizzed through this week's eps in one go because I haven't had time to watch them, and I definitely don't have time to do detailed recaps, which is probably all for the best, because except for the odd Roman or Lars/Jenny scene, they were largely boring.

So I'll just do a really quick summary of what happened (as far as I even remember):

In which nothing much happens )

[Lil: 652, 653, 654]
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Apr. 5th, 2009

Recap: Episode 650 - Too Much of Everything Lame

Is it just me or have the previouslys grown longer? It's obviously just me because I can look at the runtime on my screen, but... maybe it's just because what they're recounting is so boring. That seemed to take ages.

I nearly put myself to sleep recapping this )

[Lil: DDNN]
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Apr. 3rd, 2009

Recap: Episode 649 - Stella Knows All. Bow to the Power of Stella! Or else.

Previously on AWZ, Vanessa turned into the Stepford Daughter.

And Mike was an idiot. AND STELLA WAS WISE. )

[Lil: MRA-NE but might need cause of shout-out line]

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